| | Sure I've been out of school for awhile, but that doesn't mean I've stopped learning. The interesting thing I've noticed is, in school you learn from lectures, notes, books, labs, tests, basically everything that makes you feel and think "eww. gross." But after you graduate and you do that thing called post-grad life, you learn in a different way. Things begin to repeat themselves and form patterns. One of the patterns I've realized is something that happens in conversations. Not conversations with daily friends, but maybe someone you see once every few weeks, or longer. So what is that pattern?
The only things people really talk about are: Work, Relationships, and Hair.
WORK. The first "So what's up?" usually refers to your job. How's the daily grind going? Do you like your job? What's your boss like? You have any hot co-workers? Are you making more than I am? But really, any hot co-workers? All very pertinent questions that deserved to be answered. Usually I tend to stay away from personal work talk because sadly it seems like a downer sometimes. There's not a lot of people totally satisfied and happy with what they do. Which is understandable. At our age, everyone's figuring stuff out right? But I can answer those questions to humor you. For the most part, as unconventional as it is, I like my job. My bosses are cool, Philip and Ted treat me well and so far I have not been sexually harrassed in any way. I think. I have two hot co-workers, who also happen to be my bosses. Yea, that's right. Am I making more than you are? No. Most certainly not. Work talk is normal and expected in a conversation. I mean, who wouldn't want to know what you're doing with your life. What I'm jealous of is all the people that are still in school, or continuing school. You tell people you're still studying to do this or that and it's automatically accepted. No questions asked. As if higher learning is...respectable or...something? Who woulda thought? Kidding. I'd love to still be in school.
BOYS AND GIRLS. "So what's new?" Not to be confused with "So what's up?" which is clearly referring to work. Sorry but no one cares what's new with your job. Okay sometimes it's cool. But people really want to know who you're checking out, who you're dating, all that juicy stuff I guess. Work and relationships. Seriously, that's what it comes down to. Usually you cover the first as fast as you can to get to the latter. Relationship talk can actually last the bulk of the conversation. This is normal. Depending on how in touch the friend(s) is, you'll have to fill them in with all the details. There's a few directions this talk can go. There's "I met someone new and we've just started talking, warm fuzzies!" or "I'm having problems with guy/girl and it's not looking good, what would you do?" or "I'm so emo because I haven't met anyone in like forever years and the most contact I've had with people is the 43 strangers I poked on facebook one hour ago" You get the idea. The dangerous part about the relationship portion of a conversation is that it can go both ways. You may talk to someone extremely happy or someone unbearably sad. But sharing is caring– so let it out. As for me? What's new? I'll tell you when it happens. Cheap, I know. But I'm a listener first. Other people always have more interesting things to say about their relationships anyway. Oh what's that Wesley? What happened to "sharing is caring?" Well, what can I say, I'm a selfish bastard, mahaha.
HAIR. I know it's ridiculous. But hair talk is everywhere. Once you get past work and relationship talk, you move on to personal, superficial things. Oh and hair talk includes materialistic jabber like how the new iphone is such a ripoff but you still got one anyway...just cuz. Or how that MTV pilates dvd you bought is working wonders on your thunder thighs. (By the way, there's nothing wrong with thunder thighs, you really didn't need that dvd). Okay, back to hair. Hair talk usually follows the end of relationship talk. Example: "I dunno..I guess we'll just keep talking and figure out what happens." *Both parties sigh in agreement, followed by a brief silence* "I need a haircut." That's the catalyst. Right there. New hairstyles, hair coloring, old haircuts– there's so much you can talk about with hair. And it makes sense if you think about it. All that emotional energy spent talking about love is quickly balanced with super meaningless artificial appearance talk. But hair talk is fun for that reason. It's light, it's pointless. You may think hair talk is restricted to girls. But guys have hair talk too. They talk about...muscles...and tattoos..and manly stuff like hunting wild boar..and they actually growl at each other instead of talking. Trust me. Because I'm a guy. And I talk about those things all the time. Yup. Grrr.
RANDOMS. Nearing the end of the conversation, you're left with some time to just..chill. During this time, you might start playing one of those riddle games. "If I'm a flashlight and Annie's a flashlight, are you a flashlight?" That sorta stuff. Or you might tell a lame joke not because it has a good punch line but because it's so lame, it's funny. But among other things, one of my favorites is when one person is fiddling with their wallet and takes out there driver's license or ID and then that prompts everyone else to do the same. "I'll show you mine if you show me yours" sorta deal. ID sharing is a common gateway to another popular topic: old school memories. And by old school I mean, your actual old school and oldschool, like the slang. (I'm so hip with my lingo, I know). Also during the "Randoms" part of a conversation, it's very possible to return to previous topics. Example: "OMG I remember when you had short hair, it looked so fugly!" (Not the best thing to say, but it's true...you fugly). The random stuff you do at the end of a conversation is sometimes the most fun. It's the stuff that reminds you why you're friends in the first place. Because you can just sit and be stupid with each other.
Okay so not the most important piece of information I've learned after graduating. But it's still something I've learned nonetheless. It's a pattern that I've witnessed and experienced and thought would be fun to share. Maybe it's just the conversations I've had, but pay attention to yours next time and see if what I've said holds true. Now if you'll excuse me, I have to finish my poking session on facebook. work.
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| | Posted 7/16/2008 3:29 AM - 2759 Views - 72 eProps - 35 comments
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